Feed the Baby
Apparently hearing voices from your breastpump is common in the early days, when you have just given birth, are on painkillers and sleep-deprived. But it still happens, five months later. The mechanical baby talks to me.
When I first turn it on, the mechanism starts chanting “feed the ba-bee, feed the ba-bee.” then when it is attached it slows down a little and mostly says “little pig, little pig, little pig.” But sometimes, for variety it switches to “Jesus saves” or “G-O-P.” This freaks me out a little. I don’t mind “It’s OK, it’s OK, it’s OK.” That seems like a reasonable and reassuring thing for the pump to say. If you listen just right it could also be “I’m your friend.”
When you are pumping 6, 8 or even 10 ounces in a sitting, you have time to hear all sorts of things.
